Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Hiatus.

I know it's been over a week since my last post.  Something happened and I've been trying to decide how to process this little issue (or do I even want to address it)...

Last week I hit a new low- 135.4 on the scale.  Believe you me- it was a day of glory.  It was a day of pure joy and elation.  It was probably insane to some that I could be so happy about something so small as a # on a scale.  (don't worry that I've since gained 3 lbs back)  I don't know that I've ever felt so confident or skinny or happy in my whole life as I did that day.  It was seriously one of the happiest days of my life.  There have only been a few short moments in my life when I've touched 135, and I remember all of them.

Anyway, my roommate and I were driving in the car and I mentioned I haven't updated my blog lately.  She doesn't get to read my blog; there is actually only one person that I know in real life that I gave my blog address to that reads my blog- and I have to admit- I'm kind of disappointed I gave her my address.  I knew better, yet for some reason I gave it to her anyway, and I've since regretted that decision.  Since she began commenting to me that she was reading my blog, I realized I started censoring myself again (like I did on the last blog).  I know it's not fair to my readers and I'm sorry;  It's also not fair to me or my blog that I am constantly trying to decipher what I can and can't say on my own blog.  I should have learned the first time not to give my family and friends my blog address (I had a different blog at one point that was not anonymous and I had to quit that blog and start a new one).  Anyway, I'm getting side tracked.

So I mentioned to my roommate that I hadn't updated my blog lately (partly because blogger was having issues and partly because I was out and about celebrating my loss) and she says to me, "Good.  You need to quit that blog.  You're not a fat girl anymore.  You don't need to blog about being fat anymore.  You're a skinny, beautiful woman now- and you need to celebrate that.  Give up the blog."

Her words are still swimming around in my head and heart.

Should I quit my blog?

I haven't been able to come back and blog since; this is the first time I've touched my blog in a week.  I don't know how I feel about my blog right now.

XO-

D

10 comments:

  1. This is, of course, a personal decision for u. What is ur blog to u? Is it only a weight loss tool? A system of support? My blog started as a way to document my weight loss journey, but honestly that is such a small part of what my blog has become. Also, keep in mind that those that have support, I.e. Blog, tend to keep the weight off. Either way, we support ur decision. Much love to u! ***hugs***

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  2. I guess you have to decide if the support you get from your blog will help you continue with your success. I will say I love reading your blog - weight loss related or not. Take care!

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  3. Interesting. You can quit your blog but you can't quit me though. I know a lot of people who hit goal stop blogging...blogging helps get them there. I think you should only blog if you miss it or if writing in it brings you some peace and therapy. It's not a sin if you stop blogging...you don't owe anyone anything. The friendships you've made outside of this blog will remain. That being said - in the same sentence - I will miss reading you if you go...this blog is my little piece of you that I can always count on...but there's always texting. I love you.

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  4. Well. Is there a reason that your blog has to be limited to being a weight loss blog?

    No. That's not the question. This is the question: Since when has your blog only been a weight loss blog? Realy.

    We've heard about dattes and apartment searches and heartache and job angst and a new job and a being a new aunt. And more.

    So where does your roommate, who hasn't read this blog, get off (1) telling you that you should quit blogging and (2) then denegrate your blog and it's content? (And you were never a fat girl, by the way.)

    You know, I've been annoyed with some of the things that your room mate has said in the past, but didn't say anything. Now I'm annoyed enough to say it. From some of what you've said, your roommate often seems to be demeaning and controlling. S'up with that?

    ANyway. Blog or don't blog, but do what is right for you. If you're too busy and you really need to let it sit for awhile, do that, Diz. If you'd still like to vent a bit in an anonymous way, keep the blog. No need to post daily.

    If certain people knowing about your blog is freaking you out, but would really still like a venting and rejoicing place, shut this one down and start another.

    Really. There's no right or wrong--except for letting someone shoot you down like your roommate just did.

    Hugs, fierce girl.

    Feeling kind of fierce myself right now.

    Deb

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  5. Thirding Deb.

    Can I come slap your roommate around a little?

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  6. I have heard of some bloggers going private. If there are a few special people you want to stay in touch with, you might consider that.

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  7. Holla @ Deb! AMEN sister!!!

    Dizzy girl, this blog is about you and so much more than weight. Why would you give up blogging now that you are at goal? The fight isn't over, is it? Nope..it's always going to be something you have to think about. (Sucks..but true) And besides, you are fascinating, we love hearing about your life. You don't have to blog every day or every week. Just when you feel like it.

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  8. Well, doll, I have always been the kind of person who tries to thrive off of other people's weight loss success. I find reading about other people gettting the job done can help me find the motivation to keep going. If they can do it, so can I. I get off track (ALOT!) but I feel that reading blogs, magazines, books, kinda keeps me grounded and it's a reminder that the struggle never ends. This is for life.

    I hope you choose to keep blogging, even if it is only every once in a while to let everyone know how you are doing. Just because you are at a low weight doesn't mean you can't still blog about "maintaining" your weight and throw some juicy gossip in while you are at it! haha

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  9. This blog is about you - all of you. Every single last part. Weight is but a small fraction of that whole. Ask yourself what you want to do, what you feel in your heart is right, and then decide. Nobody should choose for you.

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